The Jodi Report: The Pen Is Mightier
January 6th, 2008 by timbotron[Every week my friend Jodi manages to be in the middle of something harsh and/or hilarious]
This week’s Jodi Report is a story of woe and wrongful shame at a local video rental franchise.
Here is the transcript from Jodi’s account:
“So, I went to Blockbuster (I usually get stoned and pick out movies). And I brought the movies up to the register and the guy at the register didn’t even look at my face. And I wrote a check (couldn’t find my ATM card) in my happy cheerleader writing with my Hello Kitty pen. I put my pen back in my purse.
I walk out to my car and then some guy came out after me saying, ‘Can we have our pen back?’ And he was walking toward me . . . and I was getting into my car. He chased me out to my car to get the f*%$ing pen back! I said ‘This is MY PEN.’ And he gave me a stupid look and said (like a smartass), ‘Yeah . . . Can we have OUR PEN back?!’ and the guy at the register and some stupid girl hanging out with them all stared at me as I drove off.
When I got home I called the number on the video receipt and said, ‘I was just in there and just got accused of stealing a pen and I didn’t do it.’ The manager said, ‘I’m sorry ma’am, I’ve gone through $200 worth of pens in the last couple of months and I’ve asked my employees to gently remind customers to not walk off with the pens.’
I got a call back from the manager (minutes later), and he said that this guy doesn’t even work for him and that the guy ‘isn’t right in the head.’ And he apologized. And put a couple free movies on my account . . .
So . . . I realized that the man had a pen shortage. So I bought four packs of pens (48 pens total). And three or four days later when I went to return my movies . . . I shoved all of them in the return slot.”
