Predictions for the (Next) Great Depression
April 22nd, 2009 by timbotronAs the Recession Depression is upon us, I thought I’d post some predictions of what to expect in the next few years, based upon portrayals of The Great Depression in episodes of “The Little Rascals” and old Bugs Bunny and Popeye cartoons:
• The greatly impoverished will wear barrels.
• There will be a stray goat in every neighborhood, often seen eating tin cans and old boots.
• Clever vagabonds will steal pies, hamburgers, sausages, pancakes, and cigars by means of a fishing pole.
• Many things will be made from soap boxes and fruit crates: cars, furniture, homes.
• Hoboes will once again arise from their underworld lairs, in hopes of finally overtaking the world above.
• “Hobo Nickels” and broken gold pocket watches will be accepted forms of legal tender.
• The wealthy will have long grey mustaches, wear monocles, and smoke cigars constantly. Especially the women.
• Everyone will wear one piece red long underwear and their big toes will stick out of holes in their socks.
Pork and Beans Bonus Round:
The Examiner.com’s “Top 10 Hobo Foods”
(photo of hobo “Applesauce Pete” from Nola.com)
