Part 1 of Blogadilla’s Medica Obscura

TEFLON FLU – influenza-like symptoms resulting from exposure to the noxious fumes and byproducts of polytetrafluoroethylene (PTFE): commercially known as “Teflon.” Symptoms include malaise, fever, chills, nausea, aches, cough and other respiratory maladies. By 392ºF Teflon-coated cookware can emit fluorocarbon gases, by 550ºF the Teflon will begin to deteriorate and powderize, and by 680ºF it will generate toxic fumes. In a 20/20 news demonstration, frying bacon in a Teflon pan reached 500ºF. These fumes are known to be lethal to birds.

One of the noxious byproducts of Teflon degradation is perfluoroocatnoate (PFOA), sometimes known as “C8.” PFOA is a known carcinogen – associated with liver, testicular, and pancreatic cancers. It has been associated with infertility and it has toxic effects on the liver, immune system, and can effect thyroid hormone levels. Here is the scary part – PFOA has been found in the blood serum of most Americans. Aside from Teflon cookware, PFOA has been found in microwave popcorn bags. In an exposé by 20/20, a DuPont representative admitted awareness of “teflon flu” . . . and so they have provided this detailed vague and helpful useless page on their website.

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Item 3 of Blogadilla’s Medica Obscura.

CHINESE RESTAURANT SYNDROME – attributed to the flavor enhancer monosodium glutamate (MSG) which is commonly added to Chinese food, the symptoms of Chinese Restaurant Syndrome can include feelings of numbness, pressure, warmth or tingling of the skin at the back of the neck and extending to the back and arms; nausea; chest pain, rapid heartrate, or heart palpitations; bronchial reaction in asthmatics; weakness and drowsiness. The onset is usually within 15 to 20 minutes of ingesting food and symptoms persist for around 2 hours. Though this syndrome has been reported by many, clinical studies to date have yet to demonstrate a significant relationship between the consumption of (pure) MSG and this syndrome. Though no current studies have tested the effects of MSG consumed in the context of Chinese food – perhaps MSG in combination with other ingredients often found in American Chinese food may bring about this reaction in some individuals. MSG is a known excitotoxin at higher blood serum levels, though beyond what one would experience from eating Chinese food.

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Gomphocarpus Physocarpus aka “Balloon Plant” aka “Hairy Balls”, spotted in Washington, D.C. by our good friend Bumby!

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Given that Tyler Perry has made it his life’s goal to belabor the joke and make thousands of movies starring an African-American man portraying a wacky fat woman, I have created this handy flow chart to identify which particular fat-suit laden actor and film you are watching (click on chart to enlarge):

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It was raining yesterday, and I haven’t painted anything in years.
Yesterday’s art project: a portrait of Steve Zissou.

Acrylic on canvas, 12×16.
And it’s for sale, if the price is right (interested parties please comment below).

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Public “Town Hall” meetings have become the new way for the average American to have a voice in the political arena.

Especially if that voice is loud and stupid.

TOWN HALL MEETING TIPS
1). SHOUT – Remember, this is about “being heard.” And the best way to be heard is by shouting. Even if you don’t remember what you’re shouting about. Your goal is to be heard, not understood.

2). WEAR FLAGS – American flag apparel reminds everyone that you are speaking on behalf of all Americans . . . except for the Godless heathens that don’t go to your church, those foreigners, and the homos. Wearing a flag also means that if people disagree with you: they hate America.

3). REMEMBER YOUR BATTLE – It is important to remember that this is a battle between good and evil; this is not about being constructive. If you lose this battle, communist conspirators may force your grandchildren to have abortions while teaching them about dinosaurs. And never forget that socialized medicine could lead to other socialist institutions like public schools or a national postal system. If we aren’t careful, we could easily end-up like those bastards Canada, England, or Sweden.

4). BRING SIGNS – Signs are simply shouting for the deaf. And it’s more patriotic if they aren’t spelled correctly. The Freedom of Speech is also the freedom to put apostrophes wherever you feel like and to spell things as you please. Don’t let the intellectual Liberal elite shut you down with their fancy “grammar” or “spelling.”

5). NEVER FACT CHECK – “Facts” and “proof” should never get in the way of you being heard, nor should they stop you from living in fear. Remember: if everyone believes it, it must be true. If everyone in your group fears that our government will create “death committees” to execute the elderly, then it must be true. Also, feel free to cite anything you heard on the Interweb, FOX News, or at gun shows. “Proven facts” are for smartasses, anyway.

6). BLAME – When all else fails, blame the Liberal media, welfare moms, homosexuals, foreigners, terrorists, and 9-11. Blame the foreigners especially.

7). TEA-BAG – Use the term “tea bagging” as much as possible – it’s time we took this term back from the homos.

Barney Frank Smackdown Bonus Round:

I love you Barney.
(via Rebecca)

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I recently saw Ethan Shoshan’s “Porn Star” pornographic origami exhibit on Notcot. I was impressed with the concept, but disappointed with the execution: Shoshan just made origami stars and the photo subjects were only men.
Eh.

I decided to improve on his concept and made pornigami this afternoon.

You’ll have to click on the links to see the totally NSFW pornigami photos:
• Attack of the Pornigami Vulvasaurs
• Pornigami Frogs
• Pornigami Naughty Bits in 3-D
• Pornigami Breasts in 3-D

Crafty? Yes.
Juvenile? Perhaps.

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