Archive for the ‘What Is It? of the Week’ Category

“What Is It?” of the Week: The Pollock Slapfight

Friday, June 8th, 2007

The Pollock, Pollack, Polish, or Retard Slapfight* consists of two or more opponents facing-off in a jousting match/slapfight with their arms held in a specific position: the left arm is bent so the left hand protects/covers the face, while the right arm is outstretched over the left arm and held outright as a slapping weapon. There are no specific rules regarding this fighting form beyond the understanding that both opponents must keep their arms in this position during melee and that combat must be accompanied by loud screaming. There is little or no information on the internet regarding this rare childhood martial art form; Blogadilla may be the first ever.

*A Note to the Politically Correct Reader: If you happen to be Polish or mentally retarded (or Polish and retarded), please do not take offense to this nomenclature. I didn’t name this, nor do I hold some official position as Namer of Late-70’s Early-80’s Childhood Games. It is clear that these terms come from a cruel era when kids freely taunted retards and the Polish. I can personally attest to the erroneous nature of these terms: I dated a Polish woman. She was brilliant and charming and insisted that this fighting form is NOT in the Polish martial arts repertoire (and she was also perfectly capable of screwing-in a lightbulb by her own means). Likewise, my previous experiences working with mentally challenged children revealed little natural ability or interest in this form of combat, despite my numerous efforts to teach them. They much preferred jumping onto my back without warning and spitting chewed-up cookie down the back of my shirt.

“What Is It?” of the Week: Brutalist Architecture

Friday, June 1st, 2007

In the early 1950’s, French-Swiss architect Charles-Edouard “Le Corbusier” Jeanneret thought “There isn’t enough raw concrete and monotony in architecture these days.” Derived from the equally painful “International” architectural style of the 1940’s, Jeanneret named his new style “Béton Brut” (”raw concrete”), which came to be known as “Brutalism.” Brutalist architecture combines the glamour of raw poured concrete (the woodgrain pattern of the mold still visible on the concrete surface) with the playfulness of military bunkers and the repetetive geometric shapes of a Russian psychiatric prison. In the United States, many public buildings constructed during the 1950’s-1970’s reflect Jeanneret’s Brutalist influence – post offices, public schools, public libraries, and military installations. Prisons reflecting this style are purely coincidental. There are even Brutalist churches (photo below) – which makes one truly doubt the existence of God.

I wish to personally thank Charles-Edouard Jeanneret (a.k.a. – “Frank Lloyd Wrong“) for making my elementary school, junior high, and highschool careers even more grey and monotonous.
Wikipedia photo gallery.

“What Is It?” of the Week: The Daruma Doll

Friday, May 25th, 2007

[This is the first of a weekly series.]

The eyes of the Japanese Daruma doll are left intentionally blank when made. The owner will then make a wish while painting-in the pupil of one eye (typically the right eye). When the wish has been fulfilled, the owner will paint-in the remaining pupil. The Daruma doll is typically displayed in a high visible location in the home or workplace – as a reminder of a goal or wish unfulfilled. The doll’s low center of gravity makes it naturally self-righting when toppled – supporting its association with persistence and optimism.

The Daruma doll – with grim countenance, moustace and beard, and absence of limbs – is based upon the historical figure BodhiDharma: the 6th century founder of Zen Buddhism (the Japanese name Daruma comes from Dharma). According to legend, BodhiDharma meditated for nine years while staring at a cave wall – he lost the use of his arms and legs to atrophy (thus the absence of arms and legs on the Daruma doll). He is known for his distinctive beard and moustache, and a harsh temper.

In recent culture: this figure was a design inspiration for Japanese Unazukin (”yes-no”) dolls and an evil cyborg Daruma appears in the action miniseries <kick-ass>”Afro Samurai“</kick-ass> (note: instead of using an Apple laptop, he appears to be using an “Eggplant”).