Cracked.com’s list of 25 Most Baffling Toys from Around the World.

(via Crocodile Skin and Alligator Toes)

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“Sometimes the best things in life are mean.”

- my friend/enemy (”frenemy”) Heather

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“Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil” (Loren Bouchard, H. Jon Benjamin) - perhaps one of the funniest shows ever to air on [adult swim]. Already done with its first season, and perhaps already done with its last season - it looks like [adult swim] may not pick “Lucy” up for a second season. Perhaps because it is a little too controversial at times: DJ Jesus (the second coming) and his love interest Lucy (the Daughter of the Devil) live the 20-something hipster life with their friend Judas, while Lucy’s father makes regular attempts to overtake the world. Plus a never-ending supply of priest jokes.

The credits of “Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil” are funnier than an entire season of “Family Guy.”

Watch some: “Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil”

Or buy some: iTunes link

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The definition of creepy: when a plaster garden gnome isn’t a plaster garden gnome.

(via Geekologie)

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Proof that cellphones are evil and that exorcisms can be performed by your microwave.

(via Neatorama)

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To the newer Blogadilla readers out there:

Yes, our favicon is indeed a naked woman with a donkey.

It was generated by democratic process nearly a year ago.

We’re the “Tijuana of the Internet” and we’re also pioneers in the world of miniature donkey shows - that’s how we roll.

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Frustrated with all the unsolicited junk mail you receive? DearBulkMailer.com has come up with a great way to exact revenge on the very people that spam you. Or, put in other words: seeing as how you receive all this unsolicited junk mail every month from spammers, isn’t it s only fair that they should receive something unsolicited from you?

In 4 easy steps:

This only works with “No Postage Necessary When Mailed In the US” envelopes, and the kicker is this: when using these prepaid envelopes, the company that receives the piece of mail has to pay approximately 20 cents per ounce on what is delivered to them. This is no problem with a normal letter, but when you tape the no postage necessary envelope to a box containing an 8 pound brick, the junk mailer winds up having to pay $25, with all of the proceeds going to the US Postal Service.

Take that, junk mail!

(via Ben; via DearBulkMailer)

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Over a decade ago, I was a substitute elementary school teacher (and later a full-time junior high Spanish teacher).

Scene: I’m in charge of a roomfull of first-graders for the entire day. A tiny girl comes up to my desk, big smile on her face, and she hands me a piece of construction paper.

Me: What is it?

Tiny Girl: It’s a picture for you.

Me: Who is it?

Tiny Girl: It’s your mom . . . AND SHE HAS NO HEAD!!!
[girl begins giggling uncontrollably]

Me: Ah. Thank You. It’s lovely. How did you know my mom looks just like this?

I kept it on my fridge for over a year.

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Today I took this picture of a Starbucks . . .
FROM INSIDE A STARBUCKS ACROSS THE STREET!!!

San Francisco. 100 block of Battery Street near California Street.

I’m too cool to patronize a Starbucks, so let’s say I was in there to use the bathroom.

The Blogadilla Starbucks Challenge:
I will send a free Blogadilla T-shirt (when we get them made in the next month or so) to the first person who can send us a photograph with three separate Starbucks coffeeshops appearing in it.

Contest rules:
• Kiosks do not count, must be a full-fledged coffeeshop.

• They must be three separate Starbucks coffeeshops.

• You cannot use Photoshop, etc. - the photo must be untouched and all three must be clearly visible.

• It must be one photo, no panoramas (but send them anyway), or fish-eye lens shots.

• The photo must be yours and taken by you (not taken from a website, etc.).

• You must provide the specific addresses of the three Starbucks locations.

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When you’ve been traumatized by goatse [SFW], you’ll see it everywhere . . . even years later.

I saw this one last weekend:
Marini’s Munchies (Candy Store) on the Santa Cruz Municipal Wharf.

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How Many Five Year Olds Could You Take in a Fight?

That’s right: all the years of wondering can finally be answered in one easy quiz. It’s good to know that those annoying yet wildly entertaining online quizzes haven’t gone anywhere!

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2006: As some of you may remember, Chevy trucks thought they’d create a cyber-hip-20-somethings ad campaign where you could make your own Chevy Tahoe commercial . . . and it backfired in a major way.

2008: BMW has decided to walk into the punch. Get a load of BMW’s cyber-virtual-interweb-hipster ad campaign for their new BMW 1 Series: draw on their car with Facebook Graffiti, for a chance to win mediocre prizes.

And the trolls have obliged.

I planned on submitting this fine Photoshop project below, until I discovered that you have to use stupid Facebook Graffiti to do all of your artwork. Dammit!

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I was excited to stumble across the custom printed M&Ms site - print your own stuff on an M&M.

The potential for evil made my head spin.

Sadly, their list of Dos and Don’ts shut-down all of my juvenile M&M fantasies.

Consider this: their list of Dos and Don’ts had to be made because people tried these following stunts:

•“Please don’t use obscenities.”

•“No business names, product names, celebrity names, . . . landmarks, and names of schools or institutions.”

•” . . . we will not print any reference to drugs or prescription items . . .”

•” . . . the only single letter we print on our candy is the letter M.”

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This is Robert Echeverria.
He’s 32.
He weights 500 pounds and is 6′ tall.
He’s a gang member.
He stars in a YouTube video where he scams a Del Taco restaurant in Rialto, California.
His bail is set at $125,000.00.
Link: Press-Enterprise story

Bonus Round: What is it about Del Taco that makes people want to act like d!cks (and then brag about it on YouTube)?

People acting like jackasses at Del Taco:
•Chair-throwing fight at Del Taco.
•Fernando fights some guy at Del Taco.
•Climbing a Del Taco.
•Saying obscene things to a complete stranger at Del Taco.
•Two girls get kicked out of Del Taco for running around like a couple of idiots

(via Susan)

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The world of LEGO has been missing the element of violence.
Until now.
The Brickarms LEGO weapons dealer.
They have everything, at low, low prices.

(via Notcot)

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Once again, Google Maps is being put to good use.

RottenNeighbor.com - A venue to warn the universe about your as$hole neighbor who lets their dog crap on your front yard, or that creepy house down the block that might have a meth lab in the basement.

Though it will most likely be employed in anonymous abuse . . .

Por ejemplo:

To you jerks with the wind chimes! -
“Hey, do you people think that it was a coincidence that the wind chimes that hung off of your deck magically had a rubber band wrapped around them recently!? Maybe. Well, I was sure to put another one around it over the weekend. Hopefully, you will get the hint. Next time it keeps me awake or wakes me up I am going to take it to work and get it welded together. Thanks”

noisey sex -
“apt 28 has loud annoying sex till the wee hours of the morning”

(via Susan, via John, via BoingBoing)

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[Given that it is now the Chinese Year of the Rat, I thought this appropriate.]

A Rat King is not the King of Rats, despite what certain dippy ballets and Dungeons & Dragons geeks would have you think. A Rat King is a mythological creature composed of a mass of rats, stuck together by knotted and intertwined tails. This phenomenon is said to occur when rats nest together in large numbers and their tails somehow naturally tangle together. They are reported to move about as a single entity, running amock and scaring the sh!t out of everyone. This phenomenon/myth appears to be of European origin and the oldest report of a Rat King may date to 1564.

For examples of preserved (hoax) Rat Kings: Linkety - Link - Link

Perhaps only worse than a Rat King is the dreaded squawking Chihuahua King.

(via Susan)

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[Note: Though this story has all the sound and smell of an urban legend, I can attest that it is completely true: this story happened to me and the wedding photos are mine.]

The wedding photographer went rogue and did unrequested art experiments on my wedding photos: he made all of the photos glowing white and blue. Everything looked sickly and bright, like our wedding took place near aboveground nuclear testing.

Trying to be polite, I requested several reprints that captured the actual colors of the event and that didn’t look like we were arc welding. I also requested a disc of all of the raw digital photos, in the event he decided to f*% up the reprints as well.

Weeks later I get the disc and only about half the photos are on it. And the disc contained extra photos: The last 60 photos on the disc were of a young woman. Naked. And she was not at the wedding. And the photographer was in some of these photos, too. He was also naked. And in several of the photos, his *&^%$ was in her *@#$%.

And though the marriage ended in sorrow and I don’t care what color the photos are anymore, this is still a good story and it needed to be posted for the sake of posterity.

These are actual photos (edited).

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This video is why I’m going to a special level of hell reserved for thirteen-year-olds. This had to be done:

This girl’s videos (all 40 of them) have been “most viewed” hits on YouTube - and I have no f@#$ing idea why. Someone had to take her down a notch.

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There’s nothing quite as creepy as an abandoned psychiatric hospital.

My recommendation: Turn out the lights and take a look at the spectacular Opacity [urban ruins] gallery of abandoned morgues and mental hospitals while playing tracks from Tom Waits’ ‘Bone Machine’.

Bonus Rounds: Tour abandoned fallout shelters or tour an abandoned missile silo while playing R.E.M.’s ‘It’s the End of the World as We Know It.’

(via Steve “Simply Spent”)

Thanks, Steve.

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