The bierbauch (which in German literally means “beer belly”) is essentially a camelbak for your stomach, making beer consumption easier than ever. Also from the makers of the bierbauch comes the getraenke büstenhalter– a wine bra, so women can partake in the drinking action. Germans are equal opportunity drinkers!
Buy a bierbauch here for just $34.95.
In a gas station today.
The candy bar doesn’t scan, so the cashier holds up the bar and, in a thick accent, calls to the other employee:
“Spunow is same price as Snickers?”
It took me and the other employee about a minute to get what she was talking about.
(photographed by Philip Gostelow for The National)
The South China Mall:
1,500 spaces, only ~10 functioning stores.
“. . . the mall entered the world pre-ruined . . . “
(via The National, via BLDG Blog)
I recently started screwing-around with Papilio Temporary Tattoo paper. Making my own transfer tattoos with a desktop printer.
The first tattoo experiment: making a “Petunia” dancing girl tattoo, from The Adventures of Pete & Pete.
And Yes. I am fascinated with this 90’s Nickelodeon TV show.
In the 7th century BC, Sappho - poet and resident of the Greek island of Lesbos - wrote of her great love of women, and thus the term “lesbian” was born.
As well as the ancient Greek sport of hot girl-on-girl pillowfighting.
The 100,000 current residents of the island of Lesbos are now taking it back - citing that the use of “lesbian” to denote female homosexuality violates their human rights, as the “original Lesbians.”
There’s a bad “Who’s on First” comedy dialogue waiting to be written about this - it starts with “Where are you from?”
Throughout gradeschool and highschool, English teachers repeatedly stated that it was our civic duty as Americans to adore and admire the works of Mark Twain. Years later and I still hate him.
Here is a revised list of the many reasons why I think Mark Twain is a douche:
• Tom Sawyer Island and the Mark Twain Riverboat are the lamest rides at Disneyland.
• He gave his characters dippy names like Huckleberry and Pudd’nhead. No kid would have gone by the name Huckleberry - classmates would have called him Hucklefairy or Fuckleberry. And Pudd’nhead already sounds dirty.
• Mark Twain impersonators (”Twainies”) are the lowest strata of the nerd pecking order - even Star Trek geeks and Renaissance Faire nerds make fun of them and beat them up.
• He was overly fond of the word “Yankee,” and often used it as an obscene verb.
• Mark Twain and Colonel Sanders used to go to parties together dressed the same. They thought it would get them chicks.
• Both Ernest Hemingway and Jack London could have taken Twain in a fistfight.
• At a time when people were dying of cholera, the standards for humor were pretty low. Frog jumping contests and suckering someone into painting a fence = SO NOT FUNNY.
• There are dozens of public schools and parks named after Mark Twain, but there isn’t even a single parking lot named after Elmore Leonard.
Last April, British supermarket chain Tesco removed a model of padded bra from their shelves.
It was designed for 7-to-10-year-olds.
A Tesco representative said:
“It is a product designed for girls at that self-conscious age when they are just developing. It is designed to cover up, not flatter, and was developed after speaking to parents.”
Here are two possible answers to many many questions that come to mind.
(photo by Daniel Brook)
(via L.A.Times)
Give anyone a moustache.
Grow it, groom it, wax it, cut it, shave it.
PetMoustache
(would you believe this is a Burger King ad campaign?)
(via PopCandy)
When friends or relatives won’t stop sending you photos of their children, make one of these and send it back to them:
Make your own: Faces of Oolong
(via Notcot)
Here at Blogadilla, Google Ads picked up on the key word “Mars” (in a few recent posts below) and produced this Yahoo Travel information ad in our ad space:
A few observations:
• “Save up to 70% at Yahoo Travel” - that means getting to Mars will now only cost you $115,800,000.
• A “candid review” of Mars as a travel destination?!
“Mars . . . looks pretty from space, but when you get there . . . what a frozen sh!thole!”
“Mars - Like New Mexico without the turquoise jewelry . . . and more New Age wackos.”
“Mars - Smells worse than New Jersey, but better than Uranus.
Vintage footage of professional jackass Bill O’Reilly having a conniption fit (during the shooting of an episode of “Inside Edition”) has made its way around the interwebs in recent weeks.
Honestly, I would be more surprised to see footage of him not acting like a d!ck.
Behold the brilliant Barely Political “unseen footage” edit of the O’Reilly pants-pooping:
(via Mary, via Brave New Films)
Celebrities like Christopher Mintz-Plasse (”McLovin” from Superbad) need your help.
Please donate now.
(via Funny or Die)
(via Susan)
Skyfish (also known as “rods” or “solar entities”) are a fairly recent cryptozoological phenomena - since the beginning of affordable video cameras. They appear as small semitransparent rods with ridged lateral membranes [top right and left photos, artist's reconstruction bottom left]. According to enthusiasts, they can only been seen through a video camera - they dart through the air at such a velocity that they are unseen by the naked human eye.
The reality: There is no record of anyone ever catching a skyfish, though a Chinese effort to catch them (in 2005) revealed ordinary flying insects. Given that all skyfish evidence comes from video footage - and first-hand observations from skyfish enthusiasts/idiots - the answers to the mystery are obvious: frame-rate, motion blur, birds, and insects. The combination of the slower frame-rate of most video cameras (50-60 fps) and the frequency of ‘wing-flap’ of insects and (small) birds in flight produces a blurred/elongated body with multiple wing-flap cycles within a single frame set. A similar effect can be seen in high speed footage of birds and insects in flight [bottom right photo].
How to Catch a Skyfish:
Bonus Round:
The stick used to catch skyfish is called a “spoodle.”
JimmyR has got a collection of some of the greatest student exam answers I’ve seen in a long time. Study up, all you young Dillatites out there, or else this will be you! Click the image for more.
(Thanks to Katya for the link)
