I recently broke down and bought the Benjamin Franklin Instant Disguise Kit.
Today I tested this disguise to see if it lives up to its name and the results were astounding: one of the images below is the American forefather Benjamin Franklin, the other is my two year old niece.
Can you tell the real Benjamin Franklin from the impostor?
I rest my case.
This Summer, Dreyer’s Ice Cream has decided to go with a limited edition “economic recovery” themed ice cream:
“Red, White & No More Blues!”
It even comes with its own exclamation point.
Their tagline: “Recovery never tasted so good.”
Really.
They are using the economic recession as a marketing gimmick at a whole new level.
Some suggestions for alternate taglines:
• Looks like you’ll be eating ice cream for lunch and dinner this week!
• You’re not working, might as well get fat!
• Buy ice cream or diapers, make your choice!
• Strawberry and blueberry – the official flavors of valueless stocks!
• Red, White & Food Stamps!
• Find flavor while searching for hope!
The real recession-friendly ice cream:
the 99¢ McDonald’s soft-serve cone.
At 7:49AM this morning (June 28), loud hairy TV pitchman Billy Mays was pronounced dead – as simple as 1-2-3. It is currently not known if the death of the 50-year-old was related to a minor airline accident injury from the previous day.
Farewell Billy – he lived life with an exclamation point.
Billy Mays was the face of many well known and fine products:
• What Odor?™
• Orange Glo™
• Oxi-Clean™
• Flies Away™
• Mighty Putty™
• The Awesome Auger™
• Green Now!™
• Simoniz “Fix It!”™
• The Grater Plater™
• Tool Band-It™
• Mighty Mendit™
• Quick Chop™
• Kaboom!™:
• The Camp Northstar or Camp Mohawk T-shirt – from the 1979 summercamp film “Meatballs” [link, link, and link].
• The Sterling Silver Typed Good Luck Token – like the old school penny arcade machines, add personalized text for $15 extra.
• The Golden Pull-Tab Necklace – perfect barbeque attire.
• The Traditional Miniature Squirtgun – a must-have for the Summer, always 99¢ and available everywhere.
• Super Slurper anodized aluminum Slurpee straws – for the professional Slurpee drinker, available at participating 7-Elevens this Summer.
• Meyer Lemon Lemonade – lemonade for the discerning drinker.
• Green Lawn Laptop Wallpapers – Summer on your screen [link, link, and link]
• Tahitian Gardenia Monoï Coconut Oil – perfect for the beach.
• Tovolo Popsicle Molds – think margarita, beer, melon, tangerine, or cola popsicles.
• Demeter Bonfire, Suntain Lotion, Spring Break, and Cut Grass Fragrances – smell like Summer.
• ‘Cool Hand Luke’ Bottle Opener Necklace – because nobody thinks you can eat 50 eggs.
• The Traditional Woven Aluminum Lawn Chair – awaiting fat asses and available everywhere.
• Squirt Gun Rings – colorful, stylish, and annoying.
• Dyeing Things with Cut Grass – like these experimental Converse All Stars.
• Ice Cream Truck mp3 Ringtones – for your cellphones, free and awesome.
• “Summer of Love” – by the B-52’s.
The Galactic Empire Stormtrooper corset by EveningArwen.
Oh man, you had me at “Galactic.”
The price of a geek boner = $500.00
Also available in inferior Star Trek version.
(via Geekologie)
Set Phasers to “Kinky” Bonus Round [NSFW]:
Suicide Girls meets Comic Book Convention: nerdpr0n.com.
• Naked Wii
• Raunchy Dungeons & Dragons
• Kinky RAM installation
I buy a Japanese candy – “Puccho Gummy” – and suddenly I’m on the Puccho website downloading awesome wallpapers and fascinated with their cute videos (though I have absolutely no idea what they’re saying).
I’m enamored with the idea of candy having personality and wearing Elvis wigs and muttering witty things in Japanese (watch the videos):
Click down there to see more videos:
Chewy Bonus Round:
Puccho candy – now with breasts.
Fruity Bonus Round:
A Puccho widget (paste code into the sidebar of your blog).
