Billy Mays – Shouting at the Angels
Sunday, June 28th, 2009
At 7:49AM this morning (June 28), loud hairy TV pitchman Billy Mays was pronounced dead – as simple as 1-2-3. It is currently not known if the death of the 50-year-old was related to a minor airline accident injury from the previous day.
Farewell Billy – he lived life with an exclamation point.
Billy Mays was the face of many well known and fine products:
• What Odor?™
• Orange Glo™
• Oxi-Clean™
• Flies Away™
• Mighty Putty™
• The Awesome Auger™
• Green Now!™
• Simoniz “Fix It!”™
• The Grater Plater™
• Tool Band-It™
• Mighty Mendit™
• Quick Chop™
• Kaboom!™:
20 Cool Things for Summer
Friday, June 19th, 2009
• The Camp Northstar or Camp Mohawk T-shirt – from the 1979 summercamp film “Meatballs” [link, link, and link].
• The Sterling Silver Typed Good Luck Token – like the old school penny arcade machines, add personalized text for $15 extra.
• The Golden Pull-Tab Necklace – perfect barbeque attire.
• The Traditional Miniature Squirtgun – a must-have for the Summer, always 99¢ and available everywhere.
• Super Slurper anodized aluminum Slurpee straws – for the professional Slurpee drinker, available at participating 7-Elevens this Summer.
• Meyer Lemon Lemonade – lemonade for the discerning drinker.
• Green Lawn Laptop Wallpapers – Summer on your screen [link, link, and link]
• Tahitian Gardenia Monoï Coconut Oil – perfect for the beach.
• Tovolo Popsicle Molds – think margarita, beer, melon, tangerine, or cola popsicles.
• Demeter Bonfire, Suntain Lotion, Spring Break, and Cut Grass Fragrances – smell like Summer.
• ‘Cool Hand Luke’ Bottle Opener Necklace – because nobody thinks you can eat 50 eggs.
• The Traditional Woven Aluminum Lawn Chair – awaiting fat asses and available everywhere.
• Squirt Gun Rings – colorful, stylish, and annoying.
• Dyeing Things with Cut Grass – like these experimental Converse All Stars.
• Ice Cream Truck mp3 Ringtones – for your cellphones, free and awesome.
• “Summer of Love” – by the B-52’s.
Aren’t You a Little Hot for a Stormtrooper?
Monday, June 8th, 2009
The Galactic Empire Stormtrooper corset by EveningArwen.
Oh man, you had me at “Galactic.”
The price of a geek boner = $500.00
Also available in inferior Star Trek version.
(via Geekologie)
Set Phasers to “Kinky” Bonus Round [NSFW]:
Suicide Girls meets Comic Book Convention: nerdpr0n.com.
• Naked Wii
• Raunchy Dungeons & Dragons
• Kinky RAM installation
Puccho – No Idea, But I Like You
Monday, June 1st, 2009I buy a Japanese candy – “Puccho Gummy” – and suddenly I’m on the Puccho website downloading awesome wallpapers and fascinated with their cute videos (though I have absolutely no idea what they’re saying).
I’m enamored with the idea of candy having personality and wearing Elvis wigs and muttering witty things in Japanese (watch the videos):
Click down there to see more videos:
Chewy Bonus Round:
Puccho candy – now with breasts.
Fruity Bonus Round:
A Puccho widget (paste code into the sidebar of your blog).
BPOW: Bacon Marketing
Monday, June 1st, 2009It’s official: bacon is slogan-worthy and has reached the upper strata of marketing.
Dear Pepsi, I will abide:
Pepsi Logo Bonus Round:
The new Pepsi logo looks like a fat guy.
Tampon Art
Friday, May 29th, 2009
For over a year now, I have encountered in grocery stores, on billboards, and in shopping malls what could be appropriately termed as “tampon art.” Cartoonish portrayals of women with large heads, huge eyes, and long spindly limbs; on a range of women’s products and always in close proximity to words like sassy, low-fat, freshness, Oprah, or va-jay-jay.
This style of art has the power to turn even the most manly of things into a feminine hygiene ad. To illustrate my point:
